A lot of guys think “toxic masculinity” is a demonisation of all things masculine, but there’s a reason why it’s called “toxic masculinity” and not just “masculinity”. In Denmark we have two shows that illustrate the difference clearly.
The first pictures are from a show called “Real Men”. It’s basically about men who are so controlled by toxic masculinity it’s killing them. They refuse to eat greens because ew, real men only eat meat. They drink too much alcohol and drive everywhere because god forbid they do any kind of exercise because that’s gay/womanly. They’re so afraid of looking feminine it’s slowly destroying their lives. The show then tries to teach them a healthier way of life so they can be there for their families, especially their children.
The second set of pictures are from a show called “Shoot and Eat”. It’s a hunting and cooking show in one. The older hunter has to shoot an animal with the help of the younger cook who will then prepare the animal with the help of the hunter. In between they do things like build stuff, try new types of beer, have fun with gadgets, goof around and chill in nature. It’s a celebration of the masculine without the toxic part. They don’t ridicule women and the feminine while they have fun with their man stuff. It’s one of the longest running programs here because it’s popular with women too. You see, women don’t mind men being masculine, they just don’t like toxic macho boys who constantly put women down to feel more important.
Occasionally the young cook will worry a bit about looking feminine but the hunter is having non of that. At one point they had to braid rope to build a bigger thing and the cook asked “Isn’t this a bit girly?” and the hunter just responded “I love braiding. It’s so relaxing” There, drink your beer and shut up, boy.
So masculinity? Yeeeeeessssssss.
Toxic masculinity? It’s literally ruining lives.
What I appreciate about this specifically is that it demonstrates that the BEST people to help dismantle toxic masculinity is other men.
Men being supportive of each other, bonding with and teaching teach other, men having male friends - these things are healthy and good.
I was told recently about a school that was shamed into changing its school motto. The motto was “I hear, I see, I learn.” Nothing wrong with that per se. Unfortunately the motto was in Latin, and the Latin for “I hear, I see, I learn” is “audio, video, disco”.
What the fuck that’s the best school motto ever change it back
getting food poisoning is a sick irony. sandwich, you were supposed to nourish my fragile meat body, not conspire with one section of it to kill the rest. you edible brutus, you fredo, you fucking intestinal quisling
this post shows true literary prowess but i wish i hadn’t read it while finishing my sandwich
i read the sentence “abusers groom their character witnesses as carefully as they groom their victims” (in a comment thread in response to a “but i know [the accused] and hes such a nice man!!”) and it’s blowing my mind a weird amount even though i guess i already knew that
